Sumptuous Trepidation

A segment of a page, the division of a prayer
The sign of a cross to shield me from my demons
Hidden away behind locked doors
And layers of decadent fur coats in a closet at the end of a hallway
A painting in front of a door without a key
And bowls of wine made from holy water

I cannot comprehend the smiles you see
Behind her facade of black linen
The closer I get the farther I seem
A regal red dress beneath a baggy black cloak
I watch her hide away

The more I know the less I understand
The caves we build and the art we carve,
Into our skin to remember our emotional scars
Reinforced by red blood beads
Dripping down our wrists

And I can see saints but they scare me
Like the dead man walking through my bedroom door
I cannot rid myself of fear
And I'm sure the panic won't subside
When I get up in the middle of the night
To fail a losing battle

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