Sunflower Dress

It was summer of 2018
I saw this sunflower dress
I put it on and I felt beautiful
So I bought it

A boy who I met before
Didn't recognize me when I was wearing it
We were going to play street fighter
Which I'm actually pretty good at
He said "A girl in a dress? It's going to be easy to win"
He never said that when I was wearing black tshirts
Is as if suddenly my dress has stripped all the power out of me
I'm the same person
But suddenly I'm not capable of winning
I won the match, but I still felt like I was losing

We cannot win
We tear ourselves apart in this endless competition of who likes the most underground and viking band
"I'm not like other girls"
We say, because being like other girls is such an insult
Being feminine is such an insult
We've seen such a deep hatred towards feminity
That we're unfolding ourselves just to rip it out
We're so scared
We're tired of feeling small
Of being ashamed of our playlists
Of the movies we watch when we're sad
Of the books we've fallen in love with
We pretend that that part of us is not there
When we see it in other girls
We try to take it out too
Looking at them over their shoulders
"I'm not like other girls"
Because that's what we mean
It's not an anthem for being unique
It's a battle cry saying "please don't hate me"
But we cannot win
Now that all my tshirts are unisex and black
They say I'm trying too hard to be edgy
That I should act like a girl
But when I acted like a girl, a girl being a girl, there was too much girl
We cannot win
They do not want us to win
They change the rules of the game
Everytime we change ourselves
Leave us a confused mess crying under our desks because we don't know how to be ourselves anymore
I'm tired of following rules
I'm making mine from now on
I'm loud, I'm strong
A sunflower dress is only that
A sunflower dress
I can still kick your ass at street fighter wearing it

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This Poems Story

I think it's self explanatory. It's about how feminity is condemned and how hard we, girls, try to hide it because of that. How it affects us and our relationship with other women.