Survivor’s Guilt

I don't want to be seen, I don't want to be heard
The pain within is completely absurd
I'm popping smoke, I cant have you see this hurt
I'm going to run, before you begin to hurt

Survivor's guilt is so real, I made it home
but your family mourns your death
I don't want to feel. "leave me alone!"
I need an out, a way to peace
I need some damned fucking release!

I can't hear over the fucking shots
I can't see through the smoke.
"Where are you?! Can you hear me?!"
The air is so thick I can feel myself choke

There is no peace for me
I'm still in a battle across the sea
The wrong thing hits the wrong time
sending my mind back in time

I can't escape the reality
that you left for heaven, without me
Stuck here in this mind leveling pain
like i just got laid out by a train

It is so hard to breathe
even more so to just be
knowing that it was you
instead of the reaper taking me.

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