The Beast


You must have felt the spirit inside me soar,
For you once again began to roar
Digging in with teeth and claws,
Until you had me in your jaws
That constant hungering need,
Turned me again into a sickly fiend
You brought such pain and sorrow,
That I would pray for no tomorrow
To wake another day began to take its toll,
The daily desperation devouring my soul
Injecting artificial happiness to cover up the pain,
Though lying to myself was slowly driving me insane
You prey on the sickly and on the emotionally starved,
Leaving sores and bruises that become horribly scarred
I was hiding from my family, I pushed away my friends
Leaving my heart broken, nearly impossible to mend
You were messing with my mind, clouding up my thoughts,
Until I thought the only cure was another potent shot
But I can live a life of beauty instead of numbing doubt
If I resist the call again, I can still get out
If just for today, at the very least,
I will find the strength inside of me to conquer
This powerful beast

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This Poems Story

I wrote this at what was to become the turning point in my decade long struggle with opiate addiction. Incarcerated again and unable to bail out I was forced to get clean. Finally able to see clearly, I realized what I had done to my life and to myself. And realized that without help, I would likely die of this addiction. So I made the very hard decision to tell my family and enter treatment. Though painful and often difficult, I continue walking forward. Forging a new road - one that is more amazing and rewarding than I ever could have dreamed.