the unattained love

I've become so fond of the emotion I never knew I could posses.
Silencing me into retreat, it acts as a tranquilizer and it numbs my hate.
But having it, disillusioned me to truth that stood completely in mid view!

Now that it hurts every piece of my soul, I find myself confining in solitude.
And love keeps knocking at my entrance, telling me that all I need to do is hold its hands.
Foolish me, how I blinded myself to your definition that lingered in the pinnacle point of my mind.

Your heart will never allow itself to be encaptured by my uncontrolled desire. You will never bow nor surrender to my want. So I'll set you free from my minds belief that I have you after all.

For others will always have your heart although you speak truth in your intentions your actions show sides I can't comprehend. My iniquity state casts you far off from me when I'd rather complete my desire to have you closer.

Woman of drunken bouts, immoral behaviour and foul language is what I give off as a well known fragrance to all eyes. But you, undetected to myself, may see me different. For I am not really what I put out, I could give you my definition but of what good would it bring if you'll never surrender.

Nights when you roam my mind, I have no reason to yet tears become the after effect. Upon first greetings I laughed at your kindness, questioned your motives, jumped to concluding means with the end results being that I "fell in love" as so they say but I more so believe I walked right into it, pupils fully enlarged and heart set on high with a broken hope that you would surrender and shatter the walls you've built around your heart and unwind.

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