This Monster

I have a monster lurking under my skin,
But I didnt invite him to come in.
Taking my life, turning it upside down,
There is no cure to be found.

The treatment makes me so sick,
What did I do to deserve all of this?
I used to live life carefree,
But some days this monster gets the best of me.

The pains, numbness, and headaches are hard to bare,
I hope and pray I don’t have another flare.
Hospital stays, chemo and fatigue to name a few,
I just live day by day to try to make it thru.

This monster has robbed me of many things,
But my faith and hope helps to keep me sane.
No sleep and restless nights,
Are all part of this life long fight.

Multiple Sclerosis causes many pains and tears,
When you feel so alone but there’s always a loved one near.
The depression, anxiety and bipolar tend to get me down,
I search for music that will bring a peaceful sound.

Loosing loved ones and friends, you thought would always be around,
You face the reality to the chains which keeps me bound.
Praying for relief every night,
I will never give up, and continue to fight.

Doctor says just take these pills,
I just cry then say, I can’t stand the way they make me feel.
Chemo keeps me down but only for a short while,
I fight to bounce back, covering the pain with a smile.

This journey with no expiration is tough,
Sometimes I question, am I tough enough?
A warrior, I am without a doubt,
Somedays I can’t even get off the couch.

Society can be so cruel,
if they only understood more, instead of acting like a stubborn mule.
Many pass judgements without even knowing,
the struggles we suffocate in when the raging river is flowing.

The fears I face everyday,
I always seem to find the strength to smile anyway.

The pain that lingers with no end in sight,
Praying this monster will stop and take flight.
This monster attacks my spinal cord and brain,
Asking for a cure is like being in a drought, waiting on rain.