Troubled Child

I hold it in my grasp , and feel my fingers begin to sweat
I feel emotionless . No sadness no regret
I look in the mirror and what do I see?
I see everything my daddy says about me
I am Dirty, useless , and trash
I grasp it even tighter in the palm of my hand ,
just to make sure i am still sane
Then i Think back to the time he hit me and disregarded my pain
And who do I have for help.. The mom who abandoned me ?
Left me to be some mans punching bag and another mans charity
Where's My clarity
Where is the life I deserve?
Where is my peace of mind?
Where is the savior who can heal the blind?
Time after time I look for the little bit of hope that remains in me
But now that hope is gone, its left me empty
I know how to fix this though..
I look down to my hand and see the blood on my arm ..
1,2,3,4,5 slits and finally have a moment of release
And I think if those who might judge me and say .. oh please.
I mean c'mon what are a few more scars to a person
who will never be free.

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