Wave


Wondering eyes all landed on my weighed down back,
Searching for a culprit to blame,
But why me?
Has your charming smile allured them into disbelieving once again?
Since when did my voice vanish in your polluted water?
Maybe I’m the issue,
Me, whose sadness rooted deep in my heart,
Me, whose despair drenched myself and left me shivering alone
And me,
Me, who willing walked into a bush of prickling roses,
Perhaps you could blame me?
I can’t utter a word anymore,
Because after you left last night,
The waves thrashing around deep in me,
Stole my last breath.

Even though you ran,
Pleaded, and cried,
I truthfully sought refuge from your stream of degrading words ,
You gasped for air,
When my juddering hands clutched your throat,
This bothered me for a mere second,
But then I remembered,
That long since the beginning,
I suffocated,
I couldn’t help loving you, my dear,
Your prepossessing curves, endearing smile, and your smooth welcoming hands,
Became my addiction,
Aqua eyes filled with unshed tears and laced with betrayal will constantly replay in my mind,
If you happened to still reside here now,
Those beautiful hands would harshly thrash me about,
So I’ll apologize just as I always do,
And let your vicious waves strike me once again.

I absolutely love you,
Can’t you see?
My chest swelled full with an unknown emotion when you withered beneath me,
Bellowing for help,
And to see bruises on you instead of myself,
Perhaps you felt my feelings as well,
The salty taste of humongous waves,
Which tossed my body anywhere they pleased,
Maybe you felt the mangle inside you and the tremble of your hands,
Which only occured when I gazed at you,
Or maybe you felt the loss of that melodic voice as you attempted to yell,
Did you drown too?,
In a river of thoughts,
In a lake of emotions,
In a sea of lies,
In an ocean of me.

Now don’t perceive me poorly, my dear,
I love you,
Almost more than Romeo loved Juliet,
But when you finally felt my distress,
My lungs flooded with the air they had long begged for,
These words might seem horrible to spew,
But this change might have saved my once adrift self,
To freely live,
To simply breathe.

A tsunami with you constantly drifted me astray,
I swam in water full of anger mixed with fiery despair,
No longer full of the adoration you once held for me,
Others may say I’m at fault,
But what else could I do possibly do,
Those roaring waves left me a weeping mess,
And an empty shell of my former self,
From the bottom of my heart,
I’ve always desired this,
To break free from those chains of so called love,
To make you feel my pain and abuse,
To drown you in my own waves of anger and despair,
And show you that I can finally swim.

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