Weight Loss

Losing weight is hard when you’ve lost yourself
I try to shed the weight as if my blood is fat
Watching it drip from my veins like
Nutrients from an IV
Filled with what I refused to take care of myself with
I hate when people ask me how my diet is going
As I shove razors in my mouth
Like they’re the tastiest thing I’ve eaten in weeks
Slicing my tongue so that I can stop myself
From swallowing the insults
That people serve me on a silver platter
Trying to sugar coat the abuse I’ve taken
I’ve inflicted on myself the diet of distaste
Where I convince myself I don’t like eating
Because I don’t need to fuel a body that isn't supposed live
So I starve myself from smelling the fresh air outside
And then force myself to consume my insecurities
Coated in wax to preserve them
But so they can still melt away
Like I wish the fat could
I find this hard to digest
But it fills my stomach
And adds calories to the count
Of reasons I have to hate my body
And to hate my mind for letting me.

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