Were You Born?

Were you born with tears in your eyes? Conceived through a swollen tongue?
Were you born with a heart so heavy, time couldn’t even carry it?
Were you born out of deep pain and open wounds and a barely beating heart?
Were you born?
I used to push you aside and await for the day where you would magically approach me
I yearned for you, my want for you higher than anything in this world, “be mine” i whispered into my tear soaked pillowcase every night
Wishing that maybe you would hear me
Maybe you would come rescue me and reverse these tears
Maybe, just maybe, you would appear out of the darkness and consume me with your sunlight
I've always needed you to come save me.
I had this idea of you that resided deep within my mind
You were magnificent, belonging to the Gods, immeasurable beauty
I wondered If I ever got the chance to have you, if I could ever even amount to you
Because you were something made in dreams, that never really had a chance in reality
The way you held your head as high as the stars in the skys when you switched down dark roads
Or how you kept your back straight and your toes on the ground, or the tears in your eyes whenever your daytime switched to nighttime
beauty never described you, but for lack of a better word I will let it define you.
And for lack of a better me, invite you to come and define me
So now that you were born
I don’t live with tears in my eyes. Or speak through a swollen tongue
I don’t live with a heart so heavy time couldn’t even carry it
See, I don’t live with deep pain and open wounds and a barely beating heart
Because you were born. And now I know how to live

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