What Could’ve Been.

I’m lost in a world where my mind is in control,
My thoughts are taking over,
Slowly killing my soul.

I don’t know what to do anymore,
Things aren’t like they used to be,
It’s hard to go a day,
Without you here next to me.

Although I’ve had many where you weren’t around,

Not one word passed between us,

So many silences of sound.
I know you might not realize,
But it hurts me deep inside,
To hope and to wish that your feelings come alive,

Your feelings for me, like the ones I have for you,
But I’m trying to come to terms with it,
Because I know it won’t come true.

It breaks me in a sense,
My heart and my mind,
Thoughtlessly wandering,
Mostly all the time.

I was wrong to say my mind is in control,
Because since you’ve been around,
I’ve lost sight of my goal,

The goal I had coming into this life,
That I wouldn’t be played and I’d set my sight,
Only on those who also saw me,

But when I am seen,
It’s as if I look passed,
Because it’s just too easy and always the same,

It was the same until I met you,
You challenged me, questioned me, and brought me to shame,
For you saw passed my eyes of crystalizing blue.

My normalities were not enough to get you to see,
That when I was messing with the minds of those who are simple,
I was sincere with you throughout all,
I just wanted to protect myself so I too did not fall,

Fall for you,
Like they for me,
But I think I fell harder,
Anyone might agree.

But they could only agree,
If they knew our exact happenings,
The funny, laughing, and even the sad things.

Maybe I’m in over my head,
Just hoping for the best,
I guess I just got excited,
It all happened so fast.

I’m not sure what to do,
I wish it’d be as easy as just saying I’m done,
Maybe it is for you,
Since I wasn’t your number one.

But you have been for me,
The past time or two,
I’m sorry you didn’t get to see,
What we could’ve progress to be.

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