What THEY Want

I always feel like I'm dying
like all of my decisions are in vain
I need to keep pushing on through.

"Do this, study that", they all prattle
in my head day and night
But when push comes to to shove,
I'm the one who has to fight.

Fight the drugs, fight the grades,
fight the man, fight the machine.
Why? Because I am an black
and a woman as well.

"You need to fight 200%!"
I'm very tired, they're not the one's doing this.
Tired of picking my way through society's bramble bush.
I'm very tired of my mother and her "suggestive" push.

I sleep all the time, every time.
I try to escape the void of the unknown.
Please. Help me.

But I know you won't. Because all I've learned?
All adults are users. So I will turn into a user too.
And when I grow, I will be the monster you longed for.

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