Where have those carefree times gone?

Where have those carefree times gone?
Every path now-a-days is paved with worries
Every choice is filled with confusion
Every moment takes me closer to a ticking bomb.
Though I dont know what it is or where I am going.
I seem to be waiting for an inevitable event, that
I have no idea of, but i'm still waiting.

The dread and fear of the unknown fills me up
But all I can do is stay calm, wearing a mask
laughing at their jokes when i'm being torn apart
Screaming in pain, withering, sobbing, searching
But in vain, with no one to rescue me.
I'm drowning in this overwhelming world.
So how do I ask for help? Rather whom to ask?

Every minute of happiness is a guilty pleasure
The feeling of being unworthy haunts me
I want to leave this burden behind to find a new path
But worries and dissapintment don't leave me alone
I fear i'll become a shell of someone I used to be
Someone who used to be independent and free
Oh where have those carefree times gone?

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