Who Am I?

I wake up and look in the mirror... is that me?
I don't recognize myself anymore.
I don't see the fun loving person who smiled at the world
I see an empty soul of someone who once was amazing
Someone who loved the world.
Someone who loved herself more than anything.
Someone who gave her all.
Now I see someone who gave up on herself.
Who loves others more than she loves herself.
I feel like my mind is split into many different sections.
Sometimes my head hurts so much I forget things I feel as I have lost time.
Sometimes my heart feels like it is suffocating and going to stop.
Why must I self torture? Why must I feel my family deserved more than me? Does that make me selfish or does it make me normal?
My heart is breaking why can I see, that this isn't fair for my family to be thought of like this.
I want me back, please let me come back. I want to look at my family again and say " Mommy is ok girls " "mommy is not sick anymore and she loves you all u conditionally"
I look in the mirror and all I see is someone else looking at me.

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