Why


You? Like you?
Is my life in chaos every time you decide it?
Do you get to own the wrecking ball and play games?
You get to own the dagger and throw.
Whenever you want to go have fun.
You also made the choice.
I guess your choice.
Some choice.
The many being small ones who jump to hug it and kiss it.
They just hear your voice and see your face.
Even the big me wants to grab it and hold on.
As my body is running away once again or trying to.
Wasn't there another who wanted to stay.
For me?
The guns that blow up parts that can't return.
Bullets that stay and ache on summer days when others play.
Blood that wipes away and soon looks normal to all who look.
But all those scars that heal we still can feel and want to hide.
Makes it harder and harder each time the gun gets blown.
How to walk.
Where to walk.
Who to walk with.
Who to walk around.
What time to walk.
Just don't walk.
How was it easy a long time ago?
As you sashay.
I just lay.

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