You Could Be…
“Look, with what you went through,”
“You could be sitting in a rubber room right now,”
“And no one would blame you.”
My mom said to me in the dark car.
I laughed the words out of the air.
“A rubber room?”
I said with a chuckle.
“Do they even have those anymore?”
I followed up the thick air with a lighter question.
“I have no idea.”
She replied with a smile.
We went on with our night.
However, her words lingered throughout the event.
When we got home, I stood in front of the mirror alone.
Standing there, I felt a little different.
I had to ask myself, “Should I be in a mental hospital?”
Later that night, I stood under a full moon.
I saw my shadow cast by the darkness of the still Earth.
Lately, I had been focusing a lot on the daytime.
In lust with the Sunshine, I forgot about what got me here.
My darkness propelled me into a better life.
I stood there having my shadow cast on the ground by the moon.
Not by the Sun, mind you.
The experience made me realize something.
The deep and dark stuff I wrestle with is actually not at all bad and scary.
I was intrigued by my shadow in the night.
The woman I was looking at in silhouette was fertile and fascinating.
The revelation could have come from the words my mom said.
But at least I could make out these connections while I still wasn’t tied down in a straight jacket.