Insane Heartache and Pain

sitting in my room
my eyes all puffy too.
I can barely see from the tears
flowing down my face like
raindrops against the window pane
while I'm sitting here drowning
in my own sorrow, I can guarantee
you out living life without a ounce
of me on your brain.
this just give people a reason to laugh
at and talk about me once again.
I want to keep the hope of it just
being the two of us but boy who
am I fooling chasing lust.
the silent water is playing tunes
in my head, I wish I really didn't care
I'm not built to take any more heartache
and pain: mothers day will forever be
changed and baby your the one to
blame for making that day a memory of
blissfulness, sorrow, unhappy, emotional
roller-coaster whirlpool.
I could never get over how you made me feel
stupidly and just drove off to leave me
crying at a table of confusion.
do not get confused by my randomization
of the wording I chose to present to you.
its been since Mother's Day Sunday and
I haven't heard one word from you;
why am I wasting my time thinking you really
could feel the way I do cause I realize this
was only a game for you, hell you done got
the pussycat and head too.
so there is no more use of me for you!
take a knife and cut my heart out because
after this I have no more love to bring.
it was fun while it lasted, but my river
has finally run dry.
thank you for making me go insane
now if I kill myself; will you be able
to handle the heartache and pain.
see I cant take any more of your games
cause baby playing with people feelings
will cause you to be left in strain
a thin line between love and hate
too much pressure will cause me to
break the chains.
my heart racing and my brain is spiraling insane.