Perhaps

Perhaps a word of encouragement, for you is overdue
Perhaps it's not my job, to try to comfort you
Just know that in this moment, my intentions are for good
But my intentions rarely work out, the way that I wish they would
Perhaps I should just run, and perhaps that you should too
Because the chance is fairly high, that I will only run to you
Perhaps this word of encouragement, is actually just for me
Because I'm tired of playing Army, not being all that I can be
I'm trying to keep my focus, trying to keep my head held high
But my mind is always questioning, if I really am this guy
It seems I have it all together, when I'm lying here in my bed
Until that one thought comes, and I can't get it out of my head
So I try to take it captive, not knowing what else to do
Because if I'm being totally honest, I like to think of you
Then the truth will hit me, that this could never be
Because wherever it is I go, I can't get away from me
Just know you are always with me, somewhere in my mind
With reality killing the fantasy, so that we both come out alive
I'm wishing that things were different, and that I wasn't who I am
Questioning God and His motives, and how this could be His plan
Perhaps I just can't see it, His plan for you and me
Or perhaps there is no plan, and this is all that I can be