Never Hold Back

Do you know that feeling of realizing you let something special slip through your fingers? Well, it cuts a hole so deeply into ones heart, I'm afraid mine will never heal. Our history keeps me at a distance. If only I had met you first. A perfect fit, but an unequal balance. I realized my feelings too late, and gave you too much space. You flew into the arms of someone else, never knowing how I truly felt. I know I must love you, because I put your feelings first. Instead of tearing this friendship apart, I sat back and smiled. She makes you happy, and I don't know if that's something I can provide. Maybe something in you didn't change that night. Maybe it meant nothing at all. Maybe I had unknowingly rejected you too many times before I connected the dots. I look back on our previous conversations and think I'm at fault. The trauma we came from, left us too broken. However, that bond we created, is what's most important. We picked up each other's pieces, but that's where it's ended. If only I had met you first, there would have been nothing to be mended. I should have listened to all the prodding and poking. They noticed before I did. Maybe that's true for you too, and thats why you did what you did. If you ever ask for my heart, I'll slice it out for you. I give you my heart. However, it's not meant for you to protect, but to sacrifice for your own sake. Little did you know the complexity of this gift I gave. I compare all men to you, and I lack all desire. I dont want to feel anymore. You have my heart, now light it on fire.